Just a quick entry this time but looking through my documents on my PC, I came across this little piece dated April 2013 in connection with Sianne's college project on Transgender people which I was part of. Sianne ask me at the time to write a short story to tie in with the images she had taken of me (as well as the other seven girls participating in the project) to be put on display in a Manchester Gallery during the summer of that year. Below is the entry which I thought I would share.
As I originate from Liverpool and still live in the area, I have always taken the view not to be “me” in my home city for a number of reasons. It is sort of too close to home so to speak but on the first shoot with Sianne I thought why not? My reasoning behind this was simple, I am confident enough to blend in my surroundings and never encountered problems visiting other locations around the UK, so this was an ideal occasion in the circumstances. To make matters more interesting it was also schools half term week in February, so there would be kids about too which sometimes is not ideal especially when you are presenting yourself in the opposite gender - this is another story though.
On arriving at the Albert Dock, it became clear early on that no person had notice me which is what I was after as clearly my appearance was as good as it could be which gave further confidence. Walking around locations although very familiar to me was a little strange as never visited as KD. Yes, it was a little odd in my mind but definitely right as normally I’m tend to be out in non familiar locations such as Manchester. As expected, there was plenty of visitors around including numerous kids and students but not one batted an eyelid or express an interest in me.
After saying goodbye to Sianne, I went to Costa for a coffee before ultimately heading home which gave me time to reflect as it was only then I realize, that again not one person gave me a second glance, including the half term students either which gave me a great confidence boost for the future especially being in my home city. May be I look better than I think? I have always strive to look the part of a lady but it is really up to others to decide that I must be doing something right in my mind.
Sianne and I met again in Liverpool in early April, this time a visit to Sefton Park which is very close to home for me personally as this was an area I was brought up in my younger days, so therefore knew it well. Walking around the park on a nice sunny afternoon, there were plenty of people (and children) in the park and again I seem to blend in as everyone just thinking I was just another lady which I was! It was not long before the afternoon was over and we said our goodbyes once again but knowing that I had achieved another milestone in being the person I enjoy portraying.
In conclusion, being “me” in my home city was something special but I never expected to do and one that I enjoyed never the less. Will it happen again? Yes I’m sure it will do but on limited occasions though as the fear of being recognized plays in my mind although clearly no person that I may know, would recognize me as they would not be expecting nor thinking to meet a TGirl, let alone meeting myself as KD! It is strange how your brain plays tricks when there is no need too!
KD. 11th April 2013.
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