Thursday, 23 August 2012

July / August 12 - Sparkle & life.

Hello blog, it has been a while and yes I actually attended “Sparkle” on the Friday and Saturday, 13th & 14th July for the first time in four years! The question is, did I enjoy it? Yes I actually did but that is thanks to my friends who I met. Met up with Tina for the Friday evening at Eden for the burlesque evening and I dressed accordingly. For the outfit I wore, see image below  and I must admit I felt good about myself too. The outfit all came together as I thought and topped off for a change with nice false eyelashes and appropriate eye make up too. The evening was enjoyable as the entertainment was good, food and chat with a small group of friends too. Later in the evening literally bumped into Lisa from Leeds in the Molly House much to our surprise and more chat and drink was had. Eventually I got back to my hotel room a wee bit tired. 

The following morning, got ready into a casual outfit and met up with Tina again - wondered around the Village, a few (soft) drinks and generally met some old faces from the past including Stephanie another old friend of many years who was on an afternoon visit. Later on, went back to Tina’s hotel room and got change into another outfit which I felt good about again then off we went to Villagio’s for a group meal with other girls. Later on we headed across the road to Eden for more girly chat and laughter and eventually headed home at about 1.00am on Sunday morning, happy but sad at the same time. 

Looking back at those two days, I actually did enjoy myself at Sparkle much to my surprise. Yes there were some sights to say the least, some girls don’t look in the mirror or just don’t care but to balance it there were some nice outfits too with some girls really made the effort and looked the part too. The question is, will I go back next year? Mmmm decide that nearer the time I think! 

Since my last entry, I suppose the question, have things improved in general? Actually no, but at least they are not got worst, so that is a step forward I suppose. Since the job interview, I have not applied for a single vacancy mainly because there are none! Well when I mean none, none that I am qualified for for starters or the vacancies are for 4/8hr part-time or just temporary short term contracts. None of which is what I’m seeking but just proves the job situation is shit contrary to what government sources are suggesting or wish to paint a picture - they have no idea. So basically, I’m stuck and cant do anything about it - sadly just got to get on with it and keep fingers cross. However, the last job knock back is still affecting me, even worst by the fact I have ask for feedback, twice over and they have ignored it and this is from an employer who say they give it! So much for their excellent customer service they seem to strive on! 

Things with M.R. are much better than they were which is a good step forward too - the spark is coming back so it has been hard though by the fact we still get limited time together because of our work rota’s but at least its moving forward. Thankfully, we are off for a couple of weeks soon so much needed “us” time will be forthcoming but alas no holiday due to no money. May be we will manage a couple of days out somewhere?

Outings since my last entry have been few with the exception of Sparkle but I’ve coped with that in the best way I can - keeping my mind occupied with other things but “me” is never too far away never the less. If I could dress more often or at least have outings back to the level of a year ago then things in my mind would be much better. My last outings have been in Manchester and just for the evening only but they have been enjoyable. But as always sad to revert at the end of the evening. Hopefully, outing’s in the future will pick up again but that will be subject to money, yet again. 

One thing that has happened but only recently, I’ve finally shaved my arms much to M.R’s unhappiness but this was something i been wanted to do for a while. M.R. cant understand why which is fair enough but this is about being the person I am and I’m not just referring to “me” either. On this occasion, this was not discussed with M.R. beforehand which was not ideal I suppose but once it was done, it was done. Since I shaved, mentally I have become more at eased with myself although not had the opportunity to be “me”. It seems if a weigh has come off my shoulders - mmm strange really to feel like this but it is true never the less. In the light of this situation, I can actually first of all, now wear some tops I’ve got and never worn because of my arms - although they are long sleeve, need not to worry about them moving up my arm. Secondly, I’m able to have a sort out of tops now and put some on Ebay - hopefully with the proceeds purchase some new shorter sleeve tops?

Finally, my thoughts go out to my good friend Tina, who recently had the sad bereavement of her mum, something that I know how that feels. It has not been easy for Tina that I know but at least she now knows her mum is at peace and sense of relief too that is she not suffering anymore. Hopefully some time in the future, we will meet again as it has been a while since we seen each other and when that happens, I suspect there will be much chatting between us. 

Burlesque (2)


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