January 2011 - The future is bright, the future is ??????

It’s a new year and may I wish everyone best wishes for the year, hopefully some of your dreams will become reality? Now as for me, what will be in store this year? Answers on £50 notes please! To be honest, I know what I wish to do, which is the same wishes I had for the last two years but no nearer in achieving them. Frustration once again, dominates my thoughts!

My last outing was 15th December were I headed to the Village, as it was Manchester Concord’s Xmas evening and I was sure that I would meet some friends there. True enough, after a quick bite to eat, I met Kate and Diana. I had an in depth conversation with Diana regarding personal matters and concerns. Interestingly Diana had a slightly different perspective to me and suggesting some things were more in my mind rather than actual facts. May be but it did not change how I feel though.

Prior to that, chatted to a nice girl from Cumbria called Amber. She looked so natural and looked young too although she had confirmed she was 40! During the course of the evening. I also met Jane Maybe and Becky - always nice to see them but it had been at least 12 months since I last saw them which was quite a shock. Time flies when you are having fun - ok allegedly! Interestingly I manage to catch up on Jane’s life but she looked so nice and could see the positive changes in her. It is hoped that we will get the opportunity to go out with each other sometime in the near future?

Since then, Christmas / New Year matters have dominated which leaves me no nearer in getting out again although I wanted to go out end of December but that went out of window for an unexpected reason. In fact because of non related KD matters, there is no money in the bank to do anything let alone an outing hence not going out last week! Even the Xmas sales have by pass me as dared not go into the shops as what is the point! The best I can do is chat to some cyber friends in order to keep me sane - sometimes it works, other occasions - nooooo! Given this situation, its going to be hard to keep some sanity but what choice do I have? As things stand it is likely to be February at the earliest for any outing if luck is on my side! Shall I start laughing now?

November 2010 - Its Tranny Season but it ain't, OK!

Almost end of the month and its cold - mmm yes winter has arrived! For some girls, it’s the return of the Tranny Season! Yes - those girls who only come out during the winter when there is short days and in their opinion, less people will notice them. Not quite true I think! In my opinion, there is no such thing as Tranny Season but each and every CD, TV, Tgirl and TS should be free to expressed who they wish to be regardless the time of year - Tranny Season is 365 days of the year! Make the most of it and enjoy it too.

Since my last entry, a few things have happened in my life but most of these will be for my private blog only - sorry girls. However, I have continued to buy more clothes for myself but at the same time manage to have another mini clear-out. So net result is evens again! LOL. Been out on a handful of occasions with only two outings this month just when I thought I could get out more! Sadly for numerous reasons, it has not happened and likewise any plans I attempt to make seem to go out of the window almost immediately - yes start at Plan A but eventually end up on Plan G or somewhere afterwards. Likewise, I seen never to get out with some friends as they seem to be busy enjoying themselves with their other friends! Getting left on the shelf springs to mind I think. So frustrating but its my fault I suppose?

My outing at the beginning of the month was interesting as I had agreed to meet a girl who had never been out before anywhere - definitely been in the closet. Met her in a well known Tgirl studio in Manchester but even after I met her there, she still not sure if she wanted to do go! Well, just say I gave her some words of wisdom and she decided to go. Good for her but I realise she did not have many clothes - no outdoor coat or even a bag which surprise me. However I’m not aware of her circumstances so cannot pass judgement. Anyway, she enjoyed the rest of the night in the Village, visited Manchester Concord and met some of my friends too. Since then, she been to the Village again but in the meantime, started the long road to becoming the girl she wishes to be! The latter I find a concern, as she has made some posts on a forum and its seems to me, that she seems to have little knowledge what is involved mentally and physically - basically the impression I have, this has just been decided overnight rather something that has been part of her life so far! This worries me and I’m concerned for her but it is her life, what she wants and has my sincere good wishes but I have reservations. However, who am I to say what is right or wrong?

As for the future, well immediate priority is say farewell to December, just not a Christmas person I’m afraid - bah humbug some will say but as if normality goes out the window for a month! Not sure if I will get out during December either as nothing on the horizon which is not Xmas party related. In the circumstances, must look forward and I’m sure January 2011 will soon be upon us before we know it! Talking of 2011 I think my main goal will be to make new friends really and hopefully one or two that may be become genuine close friends with regular contact and we can do things together - something I really miss doing. Also hopefully and once again, I can get out further a field too! Will I though?

October 2010 - Autumn arrives

Well not much to write about she says but probably a book will written in the process! Outings have been minimal to say the least over the last few weeks but there have been reasons though! KD in appearance never appeared from 21st August until 25th September, the latter being a night out with a couple of friends including my sister too. The in between period was spent mainly on the sea and an enjoyable time was had. Certainly some nice outfits worn by some women on board, but others, did they look in the mirror!

For obvious reasons as stated above, I have had no contact via the forums and to be honest not really missed them. However, now back in to some routine in having a peek every now & then. Has anything changed on the forums - I suppose not. Checking up on some friends blogs with the exception of one, who suddenly started making entries again - not much written either so clearly things must be quiet.

Likewise, no one has been in contact either and has got me thinking, do I have any close girlfriends who I’m in contact regulary? I suppose not but that is something to do with my personal circumstances. However, I think most Girls will say the same thing too. May be this is something I need to work on and see what goes?

As for the remainder of the year, well just get out when I can be it day or evening time but hopefully not too many visit’s to the Village though. Talking of which, my last two outings have been to the Village on a Saturday night but not really something I enjoy. Saturday evenings in the Village attract all sorts but mainly of the younger clientel. As the evening progresses, the atmosphere does not improve and it is a question of exit stage left. I have notice how the “Village” has changed over the last 12/18 months, although it is still “tranny” friendly, there has been a noticeable shift in attitudes towards the TG community and there are less locations that seen to welcome us girls. Why, I have no idea but I suspect “money” talks and ours is not good enough anymore. Really another reason to go further a field?

August 2010 - On a loose lead & Pride success.

Almost 3 months since I’ve written anything in this blog but all sorts of things have been going on in my life, some happy, some in between and of course, sad matters. As far as KD’s life, that is being going in a very slow upward direction but at least that is a positive step. However, I don’t take things for granted as they can change & do change.

In this period, I have kept my outings to in and around the Village, more out of convenience and ease. Not quite weekly outings but at least I’ve kept contact with some of my friends. Sadly one or two have for reasons best known to themselves, decided no contact. However, my door remains open and hopefully contact will be made eventually. Being the summer, I’ve attempted to dress accordingly given my limitations but mostly wearing leggin’s with short dresses of some sort. The combination seems to work and follows the current fashion trend. Still buying clothes and shoes - just cant resist sale bargains from time to time but I’ve also had a couple mini clearouts to make room too.

As for TGirl things or events - well never bothered with Sparkle and did not miss it - likewise from what I’ve heard, miss nothing either. Have not been to the Transpose monthly meets since March, no reason for it just spend my limited KD team in other directions and this will continue for the future but will attend sooner or later. As for forums, again spend little time on them and refrain from adding my views / comments too - I see no point these days as some people are just more interested in talking about what they done and now’t else! (Is that not what personal blogs are for just like this?). Other girls only seem interested in saying hello or wanting to cause an argument. What ever happened in helping & respecting each other?

I already know it will be a few weeks / may be a couple of months before another entry is made in my public blog due other personal / family / work matters which includes a 3 week Transatlantic Ocean going cruise holiday for myself and MR - something we are both looking forward too but sadly no sign of KD while on board. Regardless we will have a great chill out time and probably won’t want to come back!

Lastly but not least but a significant event happened in my home city a couple of weekends ago. Liverpool of all cities just had for the first time, its own “Pride” event and by all accounts it was successful. People may have thought that the city would of held its first event some time ago especially during it’s “European Capital of Culture” year in 2008. However, Liverpool is a unique city for numerous reasons and some “communities” have been better received than others. As far as the LGBT community is concerned, they tend to be the poor relation in acceptance by some Scouse quarters, so having this event was going to be a “test” of attitudes and whether it will get a warm reception let alone anything else. I & MR decided to attend the event on the Saturday daytime for two reasons - one, to show our support and secondly, see other people react to such an event especially during the Parade through the city centre. Happily, it turned out to be well supported by “joe public” and everybody seem to enjoy the whole delightful spectacle. Is this a change in “attitude” and better acceptance of the LGBT community? Although early days I think so but the Pride organisers are already planning the 2011 event! Progress eh?

May 2010 - Anything to say?

Well do I have anything to say on this public blog? Probably not I suspect but will write something never the less! So what is new, mmmm a new government and Conservative / LibDem pact too. Well it is something different and let us (the voters) give them a chance to carry on making a balls of the UK economy while the bankers continue to laugh at us for "giving our money" to lined their pockets! Enough of politics. LOL.

In the meantime I have made another entry on my private blog which sums up recent happenings and feelings. Never mind girls, you will never actually know what I'm thinking and I like that way too. I will say, I've manage to get out a few occasions since March albeit to Manchester only but at least Ive been in the company of good friends, having a good chat with food and drink thrown in too. Best of all, KD has been herself! Mmmm that is nice. As usual, I have recorded the outings with images of myself in a different outfits - dare I say even showing the top part of my legs, that is being daring! LOL.

My last outing was memorable as I was pleasantly surprised to meet "Simon" who had made a rare outing to the Village. It was the first time I seen her seen Sparkle in 2008 but she was looking great and still can move on the dance floor too! For those who may not be aware of "Simon", she was my guide along with her partner Lesley on my very first outing in the big wide world as KD. She will always have a special place in my life and always grateful for the opportunity she gave me those years ago. Hopefully, it wont be too long before I meet her again.